Blog

MONEY MINDSET

Having one’s financial house in order is key to getting the best and most out of life. It is difficult to live in prosperity when one’s life is one missed paycheck away from ruins.

Your money is on you. Although it is on trend to blame “the system” for our financial woes, most problems we have with money is due to our poor decision making. Sure, financial systems exploit our tendency to make bad decisions, but you have the power of consent in these matters. Credit card companies didn’t buy luxury items for you and racked up thousands of dollars in debt that you pay the minimum on. Student loan companies didn’t drag you to an overpriced university to study a high-unemployment low-wage major. Take ownership of your decisions now so you can make better ones and see how much power you have in changing the course of your finances.

YOU MAY RESERVE THE RIGHT TO HAVE NO OPINION

In an era of social media activism when almost everyone is a champion for some cause, when “silence is violence,” when “being silent is being complicit,” etc. It seems that we are presented with no choice but to take the side of whatever peer group we desire to belong to or want to stay a part of. Deviation from prescribed thoughts/opinions get us booted from social groups we have based our identities on so we like/share/repost/retweet whatever well-designed graphic influential peer group-approved accounts share on social media.

YOUR _ IS NOT YOUR IDENTITY

The only permanent thing in this world is change. Nothing will stay the way it is and that is okay. What is not okay is fixating your self-value on transient things such as good looks, money, and status. One day those things will be gone, then what is left for you to derive joy from? Although it is good to acknowledge and be grateful for good things that have passed, there is usually a sense of loss when these good things actually do pass.

CHARITY BEGINS AT HOME

Charity is a key function of a society. Life deals us hands we never expected and thus didn’t prepare for. We rely on our social networks to thrive in our communities. We give, they give, we all give. Ideally, there are more who have something to give than those in need. Ideally, such circumstances are temporary with great potential for resolution. Ideally, everybody in the community participates. Ideally, giving is done from the kindness of the givers’ hearts. 

MY PERSONAL STYLE

MY PERSONAL STYLE

As someone who grew up in modest means, I never had a ginormous closet with endless outfit choices. What I did have were staple pieces in one or two colors that I had to mix and match. This mostly resulted in more utilitarian outfits that were not in any imaginable form fashionable. Now, I am finally at peace with my personal style that I am able to share it with you.

How Wabi-sabi Changed How I See My Home and My Life

How Wabi-sabi Changed How I See My Home and My Life

Wabi-sabi is described as an aesthetic that appreciates beauty that is “imperfect, impermanent, and incomplete” in nature. It is a concept derived from the Buddhist teaching of the three marks of existence, specifically impermanence, suffering, and emptiness or absence of self-nature.

After watching videos about wabi-sabi and exploring the different ways interior designers implemented its ideas on their designs, a few things spoke to me:

FEMINISM IS A LUXURY BELIEF WE CAN’T AFFORD

Rob Henderson coined the term “luxury beliefs” to describe ideas and opinions that confer status on the rich at very little cost, while taking a toll on the lower class. He goes on to say that since luxury goods have now become more affordable, the upper class (and I warrant, the aspirational class) still want to broadcast their high social position (apparently, a very important part of upper class motivations). The upper class has now attached social status to beliefs. These beliefs include, feminism, polyamory/sexual promiscuity, critical theories of race and sex, to name a few.

MY LEG DAY ROUTINE

Leg day, by far, is my favorite exercise day of the week. I usually do two a week, 2-4 days apart. I wish I had a more regimented schedule, but this season of life calls for a more flexible workout schedule. There’s 3 parts to a successful leg day: warmup/stretch, activation, compound lifts/accessory/both, and roll/stretch.

Warmup/Stretch. Basic ballet movements such as pliés will warm up the muscles in your legs. It’s also nice to just feel the music and make fluid movements to gear up for a heavy lift. Another warmup I like doing is jumping rope. I do 4 sets of AMRAP (as many reps as possible). After the warmup, it’s time to stretch in preparation for my lifts. I like doing air squats in sumo position as well as air deadlifts in front of the mirror to make sure my form is on point. A well executed lift with lighter weights is better than a badly executed one with heavier weights. Your form determines if you’ll get the benefits of the lift vs an injury.

A WOMAN’S NON-DEPRECIATING ASSET: GOOD CHARACTER

Hello, ladies.

Many of you have read this story about a man telling a young woman looking for a provider about male-female relationships in business terms: that her youth is a depreciating asset while his income is an appreciating asset. That the depreciation of her youth (physical attractiveness, energy, etc.) is exponential (aka faster than linear). While I do not disagree with this statement, the man forgets another value women bring into relationships: her character.

For men who do not find value in a woman’s company aside from using the woman as a status symbol conferring a boost to his ego, then perhaps short-lived relationships that end when a woman ages out of her youth is his destiny. But for most men who inherently seek fulfilling relationships and want to lead a traditional role as provider and protector, good character is a must. On this page, this is the type of men we seek. But so many women find it difficult to attract these type of men.

TALK NO SH*T

When 14-year-old Elle moved to a northern LA suburban high school, things were not easy. Not only did I have to navigate a new school but also a new family and culture. Anyway, there was this girl in PE. She was rough not only around the edges, but everywhere. She accused me of stealing her PE shirt when mine was brand new and I had the receipt for it. She reported me to the locker lady who I then asked if I looked like I can’t afford a $10 shirt. Fair enough, she said. Fourteen-year-old Elle was already spicy in those days.

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