LEVELING UP 101

Leveling up isn’t just about your appearance. It is also about doing the internal work to bring about abundance in your life. You can’t be walking around looking like a 10 but keep dating men who don’t bring much value to your life or keep around friends who bring you down and secretly judge you. The cost of your new life is your old one. Be prepared to be uncomfortable.

Mental health. If you are struggling with issues in this department, go seek professional help. The biggest transformation you will see in yourself is how much better you feel as a person and how much more grateful you are. If you are not right in the head, you won’t succeed, period. The patterns that have kept us from achieving our best selves in the past are based on our mental outlook. It is then of utmost importance to focus on this aspect first. 

Physical health. Whatever kind of addiction you have: drugs, alcohol, food, etc., work on fixing it. These addictions consume not only your energy but also your resources. Both things you need to redirect to your self-improvement. Learn to love physical activity and refrain from excess. 

Physical appearance. If you want only the best in life, you have to give your best also. Stay at a healthy weight, learn how to dress well, take on a skincare regimen, and learn how to do your hair and makeup. Each person is different, so do what works well for you. Beauty has nothing to do with your inherent worth as a human being, but it has everything to do with the perception of your worth by potential mates. The same way you as an attractive woman would never date a financially unstable man is the same way a provider will never date an unattractive woman. 

Friends. You will lose most, if not, all of your current friends. Be prepared. No matter how close you might think you are with them, you will lose them. Why? Because humans are full of envy and even the kindest people are not impervious to it. It will manifest in your friends no longer initiating hangouts, canceling last minute, and them making snide comments about the new you. If they are not supportive of the positive changes you are making in your life, they are taking space. Block and delete them to make space for your new people. Those who can relate better to the new you. Those who align better with the new you. Be warned, however, that this journey is solitary and you will be alone for all of it, as you should be. Learn to be alone so that you may be selective of who you consider a friend.

Family. Family is important, 100%. But sometimes, they can be the biggest pains in our butts because they know exactly how to push our buttons. If they are engaging in toxic behavior, give them a time out. They can only interact with you on your own terms. This will be the hardest thing to do because “they’re family,” but I warrant that you should draw and enforce boundaries with them because they are your family. If they are a lost cause, set them free, but if you wish to keep them in your life, it has to be on your own terms. We only welcome healthy relationships from now on. 

If leveling up was easy, everyone would do it. As you go through this, you don’t need to announce anything. Move in silence. One day, you’ll emerge from your metamorphosis ready to accept abundance and joy. You got this. 

XOXO.

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